Why women are stupid

May 13, 2009 at 2:40 pm (evolution)


Why women are stupid
Sunday, 04 November 2007
A lifetime of personal investigation

The answer is: because we have evolved this way to ensure the continuance of the human race. If we weren’t stupid enough to procreate with so many … how shall I put this? … unsuitable candidates …, the human race might have died out a long time ago.

Now that you have the answer, you don’t have to read the rest. But you’ll miss some good anecdotes in that case. Still, it’s up to you.

I was listening to a scientist of some stripe talking on the radio about the human brain, specially the limbic system—that’s the one that causes most of the trouble in our lives, by the way. At some point he decided to backtrack to the time when human beings got up off all fours and became bipeds. (There’s a footprint in Africa somewhere that proves this, apparently.)

This development was bad news for a number of reasons, most of which I already knew because I’ve been interested in this subject for a long time. But the one he evoked was the extra strain that being upright has put on our backs, (hence all the back-pain every human being over 40 seems to suffer from), as a result of which the pelvic area had to thicken to help support the whole doings, and as a result of that, the birth-canal in women narrowed.
I knew we females had been suckered a long time ago, but this was even worse than I’d previously thought
Now, I had never given much thought before to why birth is painful beyond agony for human females, and apparently a lot less so for quadripeds. For one thing, animals being unable to tell us about it, one assumes that they are indeed going through the same hell, even if the process doesn’t last as long for them. Of course, in the animal world, a birth that isn’t over soon is likely to be a birth with complications, ones which end up killing both mother and baby. It’s a bit less black and white for us, so the whole thing can go on for a ridiculously long time without either one of them dying (although the mother may well wish she had done, after a few hours of it).

The scientist had got to the part where the human being had a very big brain and a very small birth-canal, at which point he made one of those leaps in logic that left me standing at the rails wondering where he’d gone: he said that to solve this potential problem, Evolution (that bastard again!) arranged for human babies to be born completely helpless and to stay utterly dependent on their adult caregivers for a very long time.

Then the talk ended and they cut to a commercial break. My mind was reeling. I knew we females had been suckered a long time ago, but this was even worse than I’d previously thought!
Evolution had to ensure that female humans never figured out that birth was something best avoided
Apparently—and here I’m filling in the gaps left by our erudite friend—in order to continue having fun with our big brains, Evolution had to ensure that female humans never figured out that birth was something best avoided, because when they realized that, our race would fizzle out altogether.

I must confess I don’t quite see what Evolution was so worried about, because as far as I know female humans have always been physically smaller and weaker than the average male human, and male humans have always been pushy when it comes to sex, so rape could have ensured the survival of the species in much the same way it still does among, say, the apes. Anyway, the biologist chap seems to be saying that having totally helpless offspring caused a particularly strong maternal instinct to be brought forth in human females, to counteract the common sense advice their big brains were giving them.

And you can see where all this has got us, can’t you? We’ve been well and truly had.

All that soft-hearted doe-eyed stuff that got programmed into us because it’s good for babies and children gets mercilessly exploited by men as well.

Evolution is not an elegant designer—it’s more like an opportunistic hacker with a one-track mind—because instead of making it possible for women to be warm and fuzzy with their offspring and also a lot more rigorous with fully-grown males, it stopped at warm and fuzzy, probably because it got distracted by something else.
We have to be ready to believe all sorts of bullshit, because that’s the main way the guys get into our pants
So no wonder a lot of women still go in for religion, even the nastier paternalistic ones that rank females in the inventory of a man’s personal goods somewhere between his pet dog and his milk-cow: compared to how we’ve been screwed by Evolution, religion probably looks to some as though it might offer less of a raw deal.

That’s not how I see it myself, but I’m trying to imagine what it is about women that makes most of us so credulous.

Again, I think the answer is that we’ve evolved that way to ensure the survival of the species. We have to be ready to believe all sorts of bullshit, because that’s the main way the guys get into our pants. Among human males, it’s only the most pathetic who have to resort to rape. (And of course the ones who haven’t yet figured out how easy it is to bullshit us.)

Hopefully, the invention of the Pill means that within another million years or so women will no longer be quite so credulous, because by then Evolution will have figured out that there is no longer a straightforward cause-and-effect relationship between sex and childbirth.

Yes, the pill should hopefully raise testosterone levels in women once again in the future and hopefully make the earth a more sexually active world. Now if only there was answer to the bitchy and illogical attitudes that women project upon themselves.


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